I'm Not Alright
by PermanentNerd
Summary: Spoilers for Chapter 94. Riza knew that the man standing before her wasn't the same. That the gun in her hand was shaking violently as it was pressed to Roy's head. But she would be damned if she let the man she loved be consumed by his own flame. Royai.


**A/N: I really wanted to write a Royai fic after reading chapter 94 from FMA. It was sooo freaking amazing! I loved it. Anyways, sorry if they are a little OOC, I'm just rusty. I haven't written one of these in awhile. SPOLIERS btw. Well, please Enjoy. This is a songfic to "I'm not ok" By Sanctus Real. Listen to it. It suits them!**

Riza's hand was visibly shaking as she kept the handgun to her colonel's head, her amber eyes watching him in disbelief as he continued glaring murderously at them. She licked her bottom lip tasting the metallic blood on them and pressed them together tightly to block out the pain. Silently, her and Edward exchanged glances and she gave an almost invisible hint of weakness. She couldn't possibly shoot him. She knew that. But she would be _damned _if she let Roy go on rampage.

_If weakness is a wound that no one wants to speak of_

_Then "cool" is just how far we have to fall_

"Mustang…just let us handle it…You're done." Edward murmured his tone firm. Envy squirmed in his grasp cowering behind the gloved hand and let out a defiant squeak as the Flame Alchemist snarled in protest.

Scar glared right back but this time stopped, crossing his arms over his chest. "I know what you're feeling right now _Alchemist_," he spat the word out and grit his teeth. "Don't waste you're time on him. Words won't stop him right now Fullmetal."

"Colonel—" Riza began to say her eyes piercing into his as she stepped in-between them. "You have done your part. You already beat Envy—"

"Shut up!" Roy screamed causing everyone to go rigid. "What the hell would you know?! This isn't between you Lieutenant! So get the hell out of my way before I burn you and Edward along with that vile of worthless shit!"

_I am not immuned, I only want to be loved  
But I feel safe behind the firewall_

"Mustang!" Edward barked feeling anger and shock pulse through his body painfully. "Will shut _up_ you idiot!? Do you even realize what you are saying?! Do you?!" He inhaled sharply, his grip on Envy tightening until he was sure if the fear didn't kill him, the grip would. "You're done." He whispered before turning around to walk away.

_  
Can I lose my need to impress?  
If you want the truth I need to confess_

Roy's eyes gleamed dangerously as he drew his hand back and snapped, the flames shooting out and hitting directly in front of Edward and Scar. "You leave when I say you can leave." He seethed already drawing his hand back. "I'm done when that thing dies."

"No." Edward replied calmly, rubbing the side of his head in an almost bored way. "I don't think I can do that."

"Fullmetal…" Roy warned and Riza felt her body jerk painfully as she saw a smirk plaster his lips. "Are you really in the mood to die for a _monster?_"

"Colonel!" She snapped, using the hilt of her gun to push him back. "That's enough! What would Maes say if he saw you? This wasn't the way you are supposed to avenge him…He didn't even want you to!"

_  
I'm not alright, I'm broken inside  
And all I go through, it leads me to you_

"Hughes isn't here to tell me that!" Roy growled placing his hand on the barrel of the gun. "Now put your weapon away Hawkeye. I told you that I would deal with it personally."

"And I told you that I would always be by your side." Riza said, her amber eyes searching his for a sign of weakness. "Don't do this. We're all in this together. Let us clean this up Roy." Her saying his name caused him to flinch. "You are only human. You don't always have to be the one who feels the pain."

"I'm telling you again Hawkeye…put the gun down." Roy was still seething but he felt his heart clench painfully as he watched the broken expression of his beloved subordinate. Her shoulder was still bleeding heavily and her hair was out of her usual clip. Another anger wave washed over him as he remembered how close Envy had come to killing her.

"No."

_  
Burn away the pride_

_Bring me to my weakness_

Edward watched and swallowed heavily, taking a step back with Envy still in his grasp. "Lieutenant Hawkeye... I asked you earlier if you two would be okay…"

"And I told you I'd manage. Now hurry up and leave. I'll hold up the Colonel."

"You aren't leaving Fullmetal before you give that goddamned homunculi!" Roy screamed and shoved Riza out of the way, snapping again. Scar growled lowly and dodged the flame easily turning his direction back to the teenager.

"We have to leave. Let the woman deal with it."

Edward looked reluctant but nodded. "We'll leave him to you Ma'am."

Riza nodded weakly. "Just like old times..." She mused quietly and winced as the pain shot through her shoulder blade. "This ends here Colonel."

_  
Until everything I hide behind is gone  
And when I'm open wide with nothing left to cling to_

Roy felt his hands begin to shake with fury barley able to keep his composure. "You don't understand what the hell you are doing…"

_  
Only you are there to lead me on._

"Don't I? Edward leave!" Riza ordered and clicked the safety off. "We're done."

_  
'Cause honestly, I'm not that strong._

"Get out of my way…_Please." _Roy begged, unspoken words going between the two of them.

_  
I'm not alright, I'm broken inside_

"I'm sorry Roy…" Riza smiled tiredly and spun around, pulling another gun from the holster, aiming the gun at a whole new target.

_Broken inside_

Edward threw Envy into the air with as much force possible his breathing ragged. Roy knew what they were doing and let out a breath of protest, dropping to his knees in realization.

_  
And all I go through, it leads me to you_

Riza aimed accurately and pulled the trigger back, feeling the bullet escape the barrel. "Go to hell you bastard." She murmured, watching as the bullet pierced Envy's shriveled up body.

_  
Leads me to you_

The ashes burst out…

_  
Closer to you_

Beginning to fall…

_  
Closer to you_

Roy felt tears prick his eyes and turned his gaze to Riza….

_  
Closer to you_

"What have you done!?" He shouted angrily, his fingers nearly forcing themselves to snap.

_  
I'm not alright I'm broken inside_

Edward winced and began traveling out with Scar in front of him. They had business to intend to and he was sure this was a private moment. He took a last look at the remains of Envy's ashes and shook his head.

_Broken inside_

"Roy…" Riza murmured, feeling a lump grow in her throat as she bent down beside him. "It's ok…its ok it's over…"

_  
I'm broken inside, Broken inside_

"I told you I would deal with it! I didn't want your help godammit!" Roy screamed at her. "You should have just stayed like I told you! Maes revenge was my responsibility and you got hurt in the process! Do you realize that he could have killed you if I hadn't come sooner? Riza….Riza I was ready to kill you...I was so mad…What the hell were you thinking? I told you to shoot me if I ever lost control!" He groaned, running a hand through his hair.

_And all I go through leads me to you_

"I know…Sir…?" She asked hesitantly, placing her hand over his. "We have to help. We aren't quite done yet Colonel. We can discuss this later."

_  
Leads me to you_

Roy's gaze fell upon her shoulder and he nodded stiffly, gaining his superior composure again. "Right. Let's go then Ri—Hawkeye."

_  
I'm not alright, I'm not alright_

The two got up and Riza reloaded the other gun that she had pointed at Roy earlier. Roy immediately frowned.

"The gun didn't have any bullets…?" He asked in disbelief and felt his heart slam into his chest. "Why…?"

Riza smiled weakly. "That's my business Sir."

The Flame alchemist swallowed heavily and shook his head, the anger still burning inside him but beginning to fade.

"I _adore _you." He whispered hoarsely.

_I'm not alright ... that's why I need you._


End file.
